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Interesting words and languages

The first word spoken on the moon was "okay". (Or not - see comments). Seoul, the South Korean capital, just means "the ca...

The madness of pluralisation

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes; but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese, yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice; yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men, why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet, and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth, why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those, yet hat in the plural would never be hose, and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren, but though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Career Choices

  1. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.
  2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
  3. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow.
  4. Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting.
  5. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.
  6. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
  7. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't note worthy.
  8. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
  9. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn't fit in.
  10. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
  11. I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
  12. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
  13. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.
  14. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.

The importance of correct punctuation # 1

If you think punctuation doesn't matter - think again!

Dear John,

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours?

Gloria

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear John,

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me! For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be?

Yours,

Gloria
_____________________________________________
And then there's always:-

An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."

The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

On the Go

After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh (pronounced go) had many relatives. Among them were:-

His obnoxious brother - Please Gogh
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes - Gotta Gogh
The constipated uncle - Cant Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store - Stopn Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia - U Gogh
The cousin from Illinois - Chica Gogh
His magician uncle - Wherediddy Gogh
His Italian uncle - Day Gogh
His Mexican cousin - Amee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half brother - Grin Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach - Wellsfar Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt - Tan Gogh
A sister who loved disco - Go Gogh
The bird lover uncle - Flamin Gogh
His nephew psychoanalyst - E Gogh
The fruit loving cousin - Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking - Wayto Gogh
The little bouncy nephew - Poe Gogh
And his niece who travels the country in a van - Winnie Bay Gogh
His mathmatical wizard half brother - Gogh Figure