Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:-
You only need two things: WD-40 and Gaffer Tape.
Rule #1 - If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
Rule #2 - If it shouldn't move and does, use the gaffer tape.
It's all so simple really.
The first word spoken on the moon was "okay". (Or not - see comments). Seoul, the South Korean capital, just means "the ca...
"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn", Clark Gable in "Gone with the Wind", has been judged the greatest line of all time in a film.
Two lines by Marlon Brando, "I am going to make him a offer he can't refuse", from "The Godfather" and "I coulda been a contender" from "On the Waterfront" were second and third on the list.
The recent fluctuations on the world's markets have coined some new fun English:-
Helium was up, feathers were down.
Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Diapers remain unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Sun peaked at midday.
Balloon prices were inflated.
And Scott Tissues touched a new bottom.
Have you ever said something and then regretted it? You are not alone...
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943
"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."
Popular Mechanics magazine, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949
"I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year."
The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957
"But what is it good for?"
An engineer at the Advanced Computer Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
Ken Olson, president, chairman, and founder of Digital Equipment Corp, 1977
"So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we'll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we'll come work for you.' And they said, 'No.' So then we went to Hewlett-Packard, and they said, 'Hey, we don't need you. You haven't gone through college yet.'"
Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs on attempts to get Atari and H-P interested in his and Steve Wozniak's personal computer
"640K ought to be enough for anybody."
Bill Gates, 1981
"Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy."
Drillers whom Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859
"Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction."
Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872
"The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon."
Sir John Eric Ericksen, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria, 1873
"This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us."
Western Union internal memo, 1876
"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U. S. Office of Patents, submitting his resignation in 1899
"Our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent overeducation from happening."
William Troy Harris, U. S. Commissioner of Education, 1889-1906
"Books will soon be obsolete in schools. . . . Our school system will be completely changed in the next ten years."
Thomas Edison, speaking about motion pictures, 1913
"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s
"Professor Goddard does not know the relation between action and reaction and the need to have something better than a vacuum against which to react. He seems to lack the basic knowledge ladled out daily in high schools."
New York Times editorial about Robert Goddard's revolutionary rocket work, 1921
"Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value."
Marechal Ferdinand Foch, Professor of Strategy, Ecole Superieure deGuerre
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
H. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927
"Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau."
Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929
"I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling on his face and not Gary Cooper."
Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in Gone With the Wind
"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
Decca Recording Co., rejecting the beatles, 1962
"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a "C," the idea must be feasible."
A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.
"A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make."
Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting Mrs. Fields' Cookies
"You want to have consistent and uniform muscle development across all of your muscles? It can't be done. It's just a fact of life. You just have to accept inconsistent muscle development as an unalterable condition of weight training."
Response to Arthur Jones, who solved the "unsolvable" problem by inventing Nautilus
"If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this."
Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3M "Post-It" Notepads