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Interesting words and languages

The first word spoken on the moon was "okay". (Or not - see comments). Seoul, the South Korean capital, just means "the ca...

Common English sayings

The following 18 sentences are all complicated ways of saying common English sayings - can you decipher them?

(Answers follow)

1. Male cadavers are incapable of rendering any testimony.

2. Neophyte's serendipity.

3. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no congeries of small, green, biophytic plant.

4. Members of an avian species of identical plumage tend to congregate.

5. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.

6. Freedom from incrustations of grime is contiguous to rectitude.

7. It is fruitless to become lachrymose of precipitately decanted lacteal fluid.

8. Eschew the implement of correction and vitiate the scion.

9. The stylus is more potent than the rapier.

10. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative maneuvers.

11. Surveillance should precede saltation.

12. Scintillate, scintillate, asteroid minific! Fain would I fathom your nature specific!

13. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses thereby the optimal cachinnation.

14. Exclusive dedication to necessitous chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders Jack a hebetudinous fellow.

15. Individuals who make their abodes in vitreous edifices would be well advised to refrain from
catapulting petrious projectiles.

16. Where there are visible vapors having their provenance in ignited carbonaceous materials, there is conflagration.

17. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly resplendent.

18. Sorting on the part of mendicants must be interdicted.


Answers

1. Dead men tell no tales.

2. Beginner's luck

3. A rolling stone gathers no moss.

4. Birds of a feather flock together.

5. Beauty is only skin-deep.

6. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

7. Don't cry over spilled milk.

8. Spare the rod and spoil the child.

9. The pen is mightier than the sword.

10. You can't teach an old dog new tricks.

11. Look before you leap.

12. Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are!

13. One who laughs last, laughs best.

14. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

15. Those who live glass houses should cast no stones.

16. Where there is smoke, there is fire.

17. All that glitters is not gold.

18. Beggars can't be choosers.

You and your boss

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.

When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.

When you make a mistake, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.

When doing something without being told, you're
overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.

When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

When you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.

When you please your boss, you're apple polishing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.

When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.

When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.
When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked.

Gopher Broke

A gopher is an animal that burrows and often destroys crops. It has large external cheek pouches and is found in Central America and southwestern North America.

The idiom "Go for broke" means to risk everything in order to achieve the result you want.

So the title of this short film "Gopher broke" is a play on words as the gopher in the film is going for broke.

New Technology - B.O.O.K.

B.O.O.K. - Introducing the new Bio-Optic Organized Knowledge Device, tradenamed - BOOK.

BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on.

It's so easy to use, even a child can operate it. Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere-even sitting in an armchair by the fire-yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.

Here's how it works: BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. The pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence. Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs. Experts are divided on the prospects for further increases in information density; for now, BOOKS with more information simply use more pages. Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information directly into your brain. A flick of the finger takes you to the next sheet.

BOOK may be taken up at any time and used merely by opening it. BOOK never crashes or requires rebooting, though, like other devices, it can become damaged if coffee is spilled on it and it becomes unusable if dropped too many times on a hard surface. The "browse" feature allows you to move instantly to any sheet, and move forward or backward as you wish. Many come with an "index" feature, which pin-points the exact location of any selected information for instant retrieval.

An optional "BOOKmark" accessory allows you to open BOOK to the exact place you left it in a previous session-even if the BOOK has been closed.

Bookmark's fit universal design standards; thus, a single BOOKmark can be used in BOOKs by various manufacturers. Conversely, numerous BOOK markers can be used in a single BOOK if the user wants to store numerous views at once. The number is limited only by the number of pages in the BOOK. You can also make personal notes next to BOOK text entries with optional programming tools, Portable Erasable Nib Cryptic Intercommunication Language Styli (PENCILS).

Portable, durable, and affordable, BOOK is being hailed as a precursor of a new entertainment wave. BOOK's appeal seems so certain that thousands of content creators have committed to the platform and investors are reportedly flocking to invest. Look for a flood of new titles soon.

Thanks James.

White & Nerdy

As a white and nerdy female this is soo funny.

"Weird Al" Yankovic's music video from his new album "Straight Outta Lynwood" (in stores Sept. 26)

How many words?

Pythagorean theorem: 24 words
The Lord's prayer: 66 words.
Archimedes' Principle: 67 words.
The 10 Commandments: 179 words.
The Gettysburg address: 286 words.
The Declaration of Independence: 1,300 words.
The U.S. Government regulations on the sale of cabbage: 26,911 words.

Your tax dollars at work.

The question is - What?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

What do you call a male ladybird?

What happens if you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on?

What hair colour do you enter on your driver's license if you're bald?

What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

What do you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

What is the speed of darkness?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

What if there were no hypothetical situations?

What do picket sign writers put on their signs when they go on strike?

What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror?

What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?

What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?

What happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?

What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?

What's the difference between a novel and a book?